I was watching “What Not to Wear” the other day. For those uninitiated few, this show features two smart-mouthed fashionistas who swoop down on an unsuspecting person, shower them with cash for a new wardrobe, and completely turn their lives upside-down. The person ends up confronting all their demons and learning a thing or two about style, inevitably becoming happier and having more confidence afterwards. On this particular show, a failed ballet dancer figured out how to let go of her past and celebrate the body and the person that she is now. She got some advice that really hit home with her, and that I think we could all stand to hear and internalize…
Stop with the negativity! This woman’s sentence structure was full of “but’s,” as in, “This jacket is a nice color, but my shoulders look really wide.” The WNTW people helped her recognize that she was totally tearing herself apart instead of building herself up. Focus on finding clothes that fit and flatter your shape, they told her, and if a piece of clothing doesn’t meet those specs, it’s not your fault. I think this advice is infinitely translatable to you, and me, and everyone…telling yourself over and over that you’re not good enough is a self-fulfilling prophecy. Change that message to something positive and you start moving forward! I have trouble with this because I’m a perfectionist – if I’m not the best mother/trainer/martial artist/wife/motivator every day I tend to feel that I’ve failed. It’s taking hard work to change that message, but I know it’s the most important work!
What are areas of your life where you have trouble hearing/seeing the positive?
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